The essence of any argument regarding the position of women in Namibian society, comes down to a seasoned universal prejudice against women; an obvious and blatant prejudice which is euphemistically referred to as a 'gender stereotype' (like liver cirrhosis) by soft-spoken, misunderstood, well-read and politically-correct obfuscating academics, a 'gender issue' by environmentally-friendly, curly-haired, go-natural activist-types, as 'God's Will' by male members of the clergy (as if they know Him personally) including female members of the congregation, as 'nature's way' (or 'natural') by yours truly, the average Joe Soap and very often, sadly unsurprisingly, by the average Sarah Soap, too. All of them are of the opinion that the way things are, are the way they are meant to be and one is frequently reminded not to 'rock the boat' (we're not on open water, have ye noticed?), and leave things as they are, what's the use of arguing, anyway? The more things change, the more they stay the same. Right?
You see, in my opinion, the universal prejudice against women flows from the age old notion that women are 'the Other'. In other words, women aren't 'part of us', 'us' meaning 'men', shockingly no, they (women) are in actual fact something 'different', something 'separate' (from the masculine ideal), something 'opposite' (to the masculine) and essentially, something 'unnatural' (not masculine). I don't need to remind any woman that men who exhibit 'feminine' sets of behaviour and character traits are jeered at, ridiculed and humiliated. Wait...what I've briefly described is merely the treatment society as a whole (men, women, children, institutions and organisations) metes out to men, yes men, who exhibit feminine behaviour and traits. They aren't physically women, you understand, but because these men associate or identify with peculiarities of what could be termed as 'feminine' (also referred to, and including homosexuality), they are cruelly abused and humiliated by essentially everyone in society. I hope you are starting to see with the clarity of crystal where I'm heading to...
The prejudice against women, the behaviours and traits associated with women, the mere resemblance to women, can make life extremely difficult for any man. And that's just what's in store for a man. Here's my question to you: if this is how society treats men who are suspected of exhibiting so-called feminine behaviour and traits, how are women treated? What is a 'woman' in the context of Namibian society?
It should come as no surprise that women (except when very young and virginal) are associated with all of that which could be associated with that which is considered 'bad', 'unnatural', and 'immoral' (sometimes associated with poverty and poor education too). In Namibia, in this year of our lord, anno domini 2014, you will search long, far and wide to find a man who will admit he admires women. Please note carefully, I didn't write 'loves women' or 'desires women'; it is as it reads - 'admires women.' And, what's more, even if such a male individual be found, hiding under a rock somewhere in Giant's Playground outside Keetmanshoop, he would rather suffer public humiliation and torture than make public that admission, or have it associated with his good, masculine name. What am I putting before you, dear reader? I sincerely hope it be glaringly obvious by now...
No one, no real man (whatever that may be) anyway, wants to be associated with the 'feminine' in any manner other than that which is deemed acceptable by the broader (male) society, especially his peers, and these are accidental bonds of relationship (female relatives), male dominion (yes, like Adam apparently has dominion over the sweet, little animals; the animals don't know this though, they're just going about their business, as usual) and for the very important purpose of procreation (courtship and marriage). It is important to note that if women do not conform to any of the above, or fall outside the aforementioned, within the day-to-day reality of the average man, they are viewed and treated with suspicion (by men and other women). They are never accepted and understood within the context of their own realities. This is important because women, due to that universal prejudice of being 'the Other', are traditionally defined by the roles ascribed to them by 'male society'. Male society demands that women be subservient to the goals of their society (for their own good) and as such, are accorded very little room and freedom to exist independently, as human beings. Most notably, the majority of women are raised with the expectation they should function in (male) society as attractive, desirable girlfriends, faithful and supportive wives, devoted mothers and kindly grandmothers.
We see in Namibia today, in this illuminating year of our lord, that women who head households, for instance, do not receive the same support or respect from their communities, as that accorded to their male counterparts. For one, comparing apples with apples, the woman who puts in the same number of hours as her male counterparts, with exactly the same academic qualifications, volunteering for the same projects, putting in as much effort as required by the task, including a friendly smile, is consistently paid less by her employers, irrespective the fact that she may or may not be the sole breadwinner of her family. A woman raising children on her own isn't worth mentioning, right? No, it's expected of her; that's her proper role...to raise children. Her 'job' is merely a hobby, isn't it? She pays taxes for fun.
The male perception (stereotype or prejudice) of women as ' feminine', meaning physically weak, dependent (on men), emotionally insecure, submissive, emotional, vulnerable, dishonest, untrustworthy, materialistic and immoral (Eve enticing Adam with an apple, resulting in their banishment from the Garden of Eden fairytale) is rife. Careful and thoughtful analysis reveals that all the qualities ascribed to women, are those least desired by men. It is therefore nothing out of the ordinary to hear a father nastily remark to his young son: 'you cry like a girl.' The association with anything remotely feminine is abhorrent to men, however, these same qualities, particularly physical weakness, dependency and submissiveness which men detest in themselves, are ascribed to women (the Other) with remarkable ease. It therefore makes perfect sense, within the offensive but brutal parametres of logic, that women who display characteristics opposite to the masculine perception (prejudice or stereotype) of women, are often blatantly accused of wanting to be men.
We should never lose sight of the fact that Namibian society consists of men...and women. Regrettably, decision-making at the highest levels in our country, is predominantly made by men (and a few supportive women). The survival of Namibian society depends on the meaningful and peaceful interaction of both men and women. Ultimately, the onus rests on women to decide whether they will continue to seek definition in accordance with the traditional roles ascribed to them by a society of men (good mother, faithful wife, supportive partner), or whether they want to embark on the strenuous, difficult and often lonely road to self-realisation, in order to redefine themselves as individuals, entitled to the rights enjoyed by the so-called 'privileged' in their society, in other words, men.
You see, in my opinion, the universal prejudice against women flows from the age old notion that women are 'the Other'. In other words, women aren't 'part of us', 'us' meaning 'men', shockingly no, they (women) are in actual fact something 'different', something 'separate' (from the masculine ideal), something 'opposite' (to the masculine) and essentially, something 'unnatural' (not masculine). I don't need to remind any woman that men who exhibit 'feminine' sets of behaviour and character traits are jeered at, ridiculed and humiliated. Wait...what I've briefly described is merely the treatment society as a whole (men, women, children, institutions and organisations) metes out to men, yes men, who exhibit feminine behaviour and traits. They aren't physically women, you understand, but because these men associate or identify with peculiarities of what could be termed as 'feminine' (also referred to, and including homosexuality), they are cruelly abused and humiliated by essentially everyone in society. I hope you are starting to see with the clarity of crystal where I'm heading to...
The prejudice against women, the behaviours and traits associated with women, the mere resemblance to women, can make life extremely difficult for any man. And that's just what's in store for a man. Here's my question to you: if this is how society treats men who are suspected of exhibiting so-called feminine behaviour and traits, how are women treated? What is a 'woman' in the context of Namibian society?
It should come as no surprise that women (except when very young and virginal) are associated with all of that which could be associated with that which is considered 'bad', 'unnatural', and 'immoral' (sometimes associated with poverty and poor education too). In Namibia, in this year of our lord, anno domini 2014, you will search long, far and wide to find a man who will admit he admires women. Please note carefully, I didn't write 'loves women' or 'desires women'; it is as it reads - 'admires women.' And, what's more, even if such a male individual be found, hiding under a rock somewhere in Giant's Playground outside Keetmanshoop, he would rather suffer public humiliation and torture than make public that admission, or have it associated with his good, masculine name. What am I putting before you, dear reader? I sincerely hope it be glaringly obvious by now...
No one, no real man (whatever that may be) anyway, wants to be associated with the 'feminine' in any manner other than that which is deemed acceptable by the broader (male) society, especially his peers, and these are accidental bonds of relationship (female relatives), male dominion (yes, like Adam apparently has dominion over the sweet, little animals; the animals don't know this though, they're just going about their business, as usual) and for the very important purpose of procreation (courtship and marriage). It is important to note that if women do not conform to any of the above, or fall outside the aforementioned, within the day-to-day reality of the average man, they are viewed and treated with suspicion (by men and other women). They are never accepted and understood within the context of their own realities. This is important because women, due to that universal prejudice of being 'the Other', are traditionally defined by the roles ascribed to them by 'male society'. Male society demands that women be subservient to the goals of their society (for their own good) and as such, are accorded very little room and freedom to exist independently, as human beings. Most notably, the majority of women are raised with the expectation they should function in (male) society as attractive, desirable girlfriends, faithful and supportive wives, devoted mothers and kindly grandmothers.
The male perception (stereotype or prejudice) of women as ' feminine', meaning physically weak, dependent (on men), emotionally insecure, submissive, emotional, vulnerable, dishonest, untrustworthy, materialistic and immoral (Eve enticing Adam with an apple, resulting in their banishment from the Garden of Eden fairytale) is rife. Careful and thoughtful analysis reveals that all the qualities ascribed to women, are those least desired by men. It is therefore nothing out of the ordinary to hear a father nastily remark to his young son: 'you cry like a girl.' The association with anything remotely feminine is abhorrent to men, however, these same qualities, particularly physical weakness, dependency and submissiveness which men detest in themselves, are ascribed to women (the Other) with remarkable ease. It therefore makes perfect sense, within the offensive but brutal parametres of logic, that women who display characteristics opposite to the masculine perception (prejudice or stereotype) of women, are often blatantly accused of wanting to be men.
We should never lose sight of the fact that Namibian society consists of men...and women. Regrettably, decision-making at the highest levels in our country, is predominantly made by men (and a few supportive women). The survival of Namibian society depends on the meaningful and peaceful interaction of both men and women. Ultimately, the onus rests on women to decide whether they will continue to seek definition in accordance with the traditional roles ascribed to them by a society of men (good mother, faithful wife, supportive partner), or whether they want to embark on the strenuous, difficult and often lonely road to self-realisation, in order to redefine themselves as individuals, entitled to the rights enjoyed by the so-called 'privileged' in their society, in other words, men.
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